001 - faith

Maxwell yanked the door of the parked car open. The two teenage occupants of the car were naturally surprised at the elderly man randomly attempting to gain entry into their car.

"Hey, old man, what the fuck are you doing?" asked the teenager in the driver's seat; his girlfriend formed a confused look on her face, but failed to find any words.

The question did nothing to stop Maxwell, who had now seated himself comfortably in the backseat. Again, the owner, or at least, the driver of the car asked as to what exactly Maxwell was doing.

This second inquiry drove Maxwell over the edge. He grabbed his cane, a 1960s style vintage Everson cane, and began to beat the young man with repeated hard whacks on his head, or any body part that the old man could manage to make his cane connect with. "Jesus-fucking-Christ, what the fuck is going on?" the driver asked as he tried to brace himself from the continuing barrage of cane hits.

Of course, no one could have expected these teenagers to know how important it was to Maxwell to sit in the back of this car. But Maxwell fully expected them to. When the girlfriend began to scream in objection to the object of her affection being caned by a senior citizen, Maxwell shifted his fury to her as well.

Sixteen minutes later, when police finally intervened, Maxwell had worked himself into a steady rhythm. The cane moved swiftly yet melodically back and forth, beating at the bloody corpse of the driver, and then back at the girl. His cane, now completely covered in blood, had also apparently fractured and now was splintering into the two victims.

Maxwell was sentenced to life in prison for the murder of the two teenagers. He is now notorious in prison for his amazing one-man rendition of "Alice in Wonderland."